Olympics

We're enjoying watching the Olympics. I saw a game of men's volleyball on today and remembered that four years ago I watched a game of men's volleyball in the hospital while waiting for Nate to get there before I had Ryan. It's hard to believe that was four years ago.

Last night Nate brought home some Twinkies for our family night treat while we watched some Olympics. Hannah asked what Twinkies were. What?! We couldn't believe she had never had a Twinkie. I guess maybe we have been doing something right in our parenting ... until last night anyway.

We were watching men's synchronized diving, and Nikki looked at the guys in their Speedos and said, "Yuck!" We got a good laugh out of that, and then I laughed even harder when a little while later she said, "Why can't they just wear a shirt!"

My talk about Mom

Okay, here comes a really long post. Nate and I spoke in church on Sunday, and I thought it would be a good idea to record for posterity's sake what I shared. Or at least, what I would have liked to share if my mouth hadn't gone so dry and if I could have taken a deep breath and had a coherent thought. Not a natural public speaker. We were supposed to talk about our pioneer heritage, and as I posted earlier, Nate stole my talk so I decided to share some things I learned from my mom.

My parents were both raised as Baptists, and as a young married couple with two small children they were living in a duplex in Ahoskie, NC. The family living in the other half of the duplex was also a young couple with small children. As the kids played in the back yard my mom became good friends with this lady, and somehow the subject of religion came up. Her friend, Joy, was from Utah and was a Mormon. Mom said she didn't know anything about Mormons, so she just started asking some questions. She also said Dad loved to talk religion with anybody, so it wasn't long before they were meeting with the missionaries and taking the discussions. She said she started reading the Book of Mormon to see what was wrong with it, but when she couldn't find anything she decided she should really take the missionaries' challenge to pray to find out if it was true. She received her answer and both she and Dad were baptized.

I was only a year and half old when my dad got sick with a brain tumor. They had started a greenhouse business just a few years earlier, but Dad's sickness left him unable to work. Eventually, Mom and the Littles joined their nursery businesses together, and we gained the greatest friends of our lives. She was never able to be a stay-at-home mother. Being a small business owner is certainly not a 9-5, Mon-Fri. kind of job. But even though she worked a lot, I always knew she would rather have been home with us. I wanted to grow up to be a stay-at-home mom, and I think that desire came from her.

She also taught us the importance of the Sabbath day. Sundays were for church and family. My dad wasn't active in the church for very long. He quit going to church before I was born, so that meant that Mom was the one responsible for getting all five of us kids to church by herself every Sunday. Flowers still need to be watered on Sundays, so she would have to take her turn watering on Sundays every few weeks, but even on those weekends she would make the effort to attend as much of church as she could. Sometimes loads of flowers would have to be delivered to a nursery in D.C. that bought a lot of our plants. She wrote this in one of her letters to my brother who was serving a mission: "Looks like if we have a load tonight, I will have to take it. I’m supposed to give a short talk in Sacrament, so I wouldn’t mind missing it. If we do go, I think I’ll take kids and unload in the night. That way, I can be back on time. (May 9, 1992)" I thought it was pretty incredible just how much she would be willing to do to make it to church and fulfill her responsibilities. She said that Sundays were her favorite day of the week. This is another excerpt from one of her letters to Mike: “Another short weekend. How was yours? I guess Saturdays are work days for you like the rest. But, aren’t Sundays great? It is such a change from the regular week.(May 1, 1992)"

Mom also taught us the importance of being involved in all of the meetings and activities at church. She served as a youth leader for a long time and she would get so frustrated that the youth who were really struggling seemed to always miss the activities that were really great and end up coming to the ones that weren't so hot. I remember her pointing out to me that you can't just come to church sometimes because you never know which meeting or activity will be an amazing one that you can gain so much from; you're more likely to miss the good stuff if you just participate sometimes.

Recently I was reading a talk given by President Uchtdorf from this past General Conference. He shared an experience about accepting a calling that reminded me of Mom's attitude towards serving in the church. "I had just received a promotion at work that would require a great deal of my time and attention. During this busy season of my life, Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin extended a call to me to serve as stake president.

During my interview with him, many thoughts raced through my mind, not the least of which was the unsettling worry that I might not have the time this calling would require. Although I felt humbled and honored by the call, I briefly wondered if I could accept it. But it was only a fleeting thought because I knew that Elder Wirthlin was called of God and that he was doing the Lord’s work. What could I do but accept?

There are times when we have to step into the darkness in faith, confident that God will place solid ground beneath our feet once we do. And so I accepted gladly, knowing that God would provide." 

Mom was asked to serve as the Young Women's president when my sister was in Young Womens, and Mom worried that Kellee already got enough of her preaching and probably could benefit from having someone else fill the position. But she faithfully accepted the calling trusting that the Lord was asking her to do this and He would work it out. I have heard Kellee say that it was really great having Mom serve as her Young Women's president, and I must say Mom really was a fabulous youth leader. She made the gospel fun.

Speaking of fun, the Family Proclamation teaches that wholesome recreational activities are a part of creating successful families. Mom was great with this. I remember one evening she decided she wanted to watch the sun rise over the ocean. So, we packed blankets and everyone piled in the car and we drove the hour and a half to the beach. We stayed on the beach all night (I don't even know if that's legal these days) talking and watching the waves crash in the moonlight and then watched the sunrise. Then we piled back in the car and drove home to get ready for work and school. I will never forget that. Our family home evenings weren't always very conventional either. We had ping pong tournaments, we roasted hot dogs and marshmallows over the campfire while Dad told stories, she wasn't afraid to consider watching the NCAA basketball championship a valid family night activity, we played Spoons and Scattergories and Pictionary and I'm sure tons of other games. In one of her letters to Mike she told him about trying to decide what to do for family home evening that night. She said, "We talked about a lot of things to do, like stuffing Gary’s car with newspapers (but he keeps it locked), playing putt-putt (but it was too cool for the little ones), the shopping cart game at the grocery store (but that one scares me), etc. We finally settled on going to the Corral. Not very interesting or spiritual but a real treat since we haven’t done it in quite a while, especially together." (I feel the need to explain that putt-putt is miniature golf, and the Golden Corral was just about the only sit-down restaurant in our town besides Pizza Hut.)

She also taught me to love the scriptures. I'm sure she taught many lessons on the importance of reading our scriptures everyday, but what I remember most is walking into her room at night and seeing her reading the Book of Mormon. I think she also did a good job talking to us about the things she was learning as she was studying. On the way home from church we were often discussing the things we had learned in our lessons and classes that day. This is a journal entry I wrote a few years after she died: "Tonight as I was reading my scriptures I started thinking about Mom. I was thinking about the day of the accident and how that afternoon someone brought the personal belongings from the car to Grandma Bass's house. Mom's Book of Mormon was there, and it was neat to flip through and see her markings. But tonight I realized that because her Book of Mormon was in the box of belongings from the car, that meant that she had them out and not tucked away in her suitcase. I love my mom. She was actively studying her scriptures whenever she could. It's amazing how she is still teaching me. In Mosiah 3:19 it says that we should be 'willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him.' Mom was that way. I hope I can be able to do that." Her favorite scripture (at least one of them) was Helaman's description of the stripling warriors found in Alma 57:21: "Yea, and they did obey and observe to perform every word of command with exactness; yea, and even according to their faith it was done unto them; and I did remember the words which they said unto me that their mothers had taught them." She wanted to be as obedient as the stripling warriors, and I think she did a pretty good job of it.

Mom was also quick to acknowledge her blessings. I have never had a hard time paying tithing because of her example. We never had a lot of money, but we always had everything we needed. She faithfully paid her tithing and always made it clear that this was the reason our needs were always met. She also felt like our family received many blessings from Mike's decision to serve a mission. There were quite a few that she pointed out to him in her letters. This is just one example that I really liked. Before leaving on their missions, Mike and Greg thought they might want to start a landscaping business and got a job planting trees along both sides of a long driveway leading to a plantation house. Mom wrote to him, "Remember that second planting of trees you and Greg did? Well, about six of them had died. That really bothered me. I felt you were responsible to get them to live. None of them had leaves on them last year. But, believe it or not, this spring, there are leaves on those trees. There is only one up on the road front (that the horses chewed on) that does not have leaves. I honestly think they were dead, but because you and Greg are serving the Lord now, He performed a miracle on those trees. He really cares. That is what is so great about the gospel. Not only is it true, but it brings joy and wonders that we can appreciate if we only do our part. I know it is true. I also know that God loves all of us and is pulling for us. He is there!” (April 24, 1992)

This quote from the same talk by President Uchtdorf that I mentioned earlier also reminded me of my mom. "We need to be constantly reminded of the eternal reasons behind the things we are commanded to do. The basic gospel principles need to be part of our life’s fabric, even if it means learning them over and over again. That doesn’t mean that this process should be rote or boring. Rather, when we teach the foundational principles in our homes or in church, let the flame of enthusiasm for the gospel and the fire of testimony bring light, warmth, and joy to the hearts of those we teach." The gospel was definitely a part of her life's fabric, she called it an everyday religion. And she was in no way boring. She was happy and fun even though she faced many challenges in her life, and I know she would attribute that to the gospel of Jesus Christ. Her life showed her testimony. I think of her when I read James 1:22, "But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only."

During youth conference one year, the youth leaders handed each of us letters that our parents had written to us. This is one paragraph of the letter she wrote me, "I know His gospel is true and can lead us to happiness. I am so grateful for the direction it has given our family. I am sure we would be so worldly and unhappy without the gospel. I know that the Church is the tool set up to help us learn. I enjoy all the activities and opportunities it gives us. I know Heavenly Father and Jesus live and they care about every aspect of our lives."

I will forever be grateful that her heart and mind were open to hearing the Spirit, and that she was courageous enough to not only accept the gospel but to continue to live it throughout her life.

Some lessons are hard to learn

I'm supposed to be writing a talk right now for Sacrament meeting and I was reading through some letters from my mom to my brother when he was on his mission. I'm supposed to be talking on our pioneer heritage, so I thought I might find something in them that I could share about my mom.

I should preface this with the fact that we were asked two weeks ago to speak. Nate was pretty slick, though, because when we were first given the topic he asked me what my thoughts were on it. I shared what I had been thinking, and then within three days he had written a beautiful talk expounding on my ideas! So, since it's now a few days away from when I'm supposed to speak, I thought I would try not to procrastinate too much and get started on writing something down.

I came across this paragraph Mom had written in a letter:
May 5, 1992 -- "Susan has a science project due tomorrow and just started on it yesterday. She was supposed to experiment on different kinds of water on plants, like mineral, tap, and salt. She had all the materials for about three weeks, but has delayed doing it. Now she will have two days to do the experiment. I told her she must tell the truth on the procedure and results. She is not too happy about it. She may not make a good grade, but at least she will be honest -- maybe that will count for something with the teacher."

I laughed so hard when I read that. Maybe I learned a lesson in honesty, but I don't think the one on procrastination has sunk in too well, yet. Although, this time I have started preparing 4 days out instead of just 2!

*******

Oh, I just found another funny one! --  December 22, 1992 "We are putting the finishing touches on Christmas. The kids are out of school now and are "doing their thing." Kellee cleaned her room yesterday -- it looks great. You wouldn't believe Susan's. I am going to get a picture of it. Can't even open the door. She didn't want to sleep in her own bed last night -- probably because she had to clean so much mess off it."

Wow, I really haven't grown up yet! Good thing Nate didn't read this stuff before he married me!

Star Wars & Peanut Butter Balls

The other day at the dinner table Nate and I realized that our girls have never seen Star Wars. So we started telling our favorite lines and scenes, and tried to impersonate the different characters (the best of course are Yoda and Chewy). We had a lot of fun, but our kids thought we were a little crazy. On Saturday Nate took the kids out and came home having rented all of the original three episodes. I really don't think I've ever seen more than the first 20 minutes of Episode IV, so that was our family night activity tonight. It was a lot more interesting than I remember it as a kid. My parents had VHS copies of Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi that I watched thousands of times growing up, so I'm excited to see Empire Strikes Back tomorrow with the kids.

For our family night treat we ate peanut butter balls while watching the movie. That has become our go-to treat lately because Nikki can make it all on her own while I take a nap on Sunday afternoons. Talk about the fruit of my labors! I know everyone has a recipe for them, and this is the one we use. Sometimes we add the chocolate and sometimes we don't.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Balls
1 1/4 cups powdered sugar, divided
1 tablespoon cocoa powder
1/2 cup peanut butter
1 tablespoon milk
1 tablespoon vanilla

Stir 1 cup powdered sugar with the cocoa powder. Mix in all other ingredients. Form into balls and roll in remaining 1/4 cup powdered sugar. Refrigerate any leftovers.

School prep

So, I'm finally ready to start thinking about homeschool again. I think I have now finished ordering all of our books. I had really intended to continue a few things through the summer, but I needed a break, and it lasted through the whole month of June and now into July. And I hope the girls will appreciate and enjoy it when we start our routine again. I'm using this post to gather my thoughts and make some concrete plans for the coming year.

I went to two homeschool conferences in May, and I learned a lot. I want to be a little more hands-on with my girls this year than I was last year. I think it has taken me a while to figure out how to eliminate distractions and really focus on school during the day. It is such a different mindset from having them in public school, and I hope I am starting to get it. I know Hannah and Nikki both need me to be a little bit more involved in certain subjects than I was last year. They are getting older and can do a lot of things on their own, but I need to do a better job of being readily available while they are working.

A couple of months ago I bought a kitchen table at a yard sale in our neighborhood, and we put that in the bonus room. The kids weren't really happy that we took up so much of their play space, but come on, they can play a game on the table! While they enjoy doing work on the couch and on their beds, there are some subjects (like math and grammar) that I cannot allow to be done anymore while laying on the couch complaining about how much they just don't want to do it. And since Nikki seems to not be able to complete a math problem without speaking (except I know she was silent in public school!!), we now have separate work spaces for important subjects. I believe that will be a big help.

I've never felt comfortable implementing a time frame for each subject, and that just has to do with the personalities of my girls. If I said that math was supposed to be finished by 10:00 each morning and Hannah wasn't done by then, there is a good possibility she would get really upset and be miserable for the rest of the day. If I set a specific time frame for Nikki she would get bored and frustrated because either she finished early or she just wanted to do spelling before math today. So, I decided to make a list of work that needs to be completed before lunch, and work that needs to be completed before it's time to clean up in the afternoon. For things that we do together, I just start those in the morning after our devotional and then we work together again right after lunch. So those items get completed first before they break off on their own. Hannah appreciates the order of the list, and Nikki appreciates the freedom to complete whatever subject on the list she wants. Hannah can take as much time as she wants on each subject, and Nikki can speed through however quickly she chooses (and then spend the rest of her time correcting it).

This is the schedule we're going to start with this year:

Morning jobs -- (bed, get dressed, hair, etc.)
Breakfast
8 am --devotional (includes prayer, hymn or primary song, scripture study, scripture memorization, and an article from the Friend) We usually read scriptures together as a family at breakfast, but I want to include Nate in our whole devotional as much as we can so we'll add in our scripture reading here too.
8:30 -- History/Science
Music (piano, violin)
Math
Spelling
Logic (Hannah)/Penmanship (Nikki)
Grammar
12 pm -- Lunch
Latin
Spanish
Reading (as a group and individually)
15 minute Room Rescue

I'm not sure if that's really going to work. Last year we did History and Science at the end of the day, and it was just too easy to not do it. So I want to do that in the morning before we separate, but I think I may need to move Spelling and Logic to after lunch. We'll just have to see how the timing works out. I like having them practice their music before starting their math because studies really show that music wakes up your brain. I heard Michael Ballam give a really cool talk on that once. Having reading time at the end of the day is a good motivator for Hannah to complete the other stuff, and then I don't have to tell her to quit reading (except to come clean up for a few minutes).

Now, where does Ryan fit into it all? Good question! :) I seriously considered putting him in preschool this coming year, but we are going to be participating in a homeschool co-op on Wednesday mornings where he will have a little bit of a preschool class, and then Hannah will be doing Classical Conversations on Friday afternoons. While she is there, Ryan and Nikki will be able to play with the other kids who have siblings in class. So, that gives him two days already that he will be involved in groups outside of home. He actually really loves "school work" and was even asking me today to go look in his book to see what he was supposed to learn today. Last year I used a book called Slow and Steady, Get Me Ready, which he loves. Here again, I hope to do a better job with him this year, and I need to do a little more research about some ideas for him. Pinterest is actually pretty amazing for this. My #1 main goal for him is to keep him off of Netflix during school hours. Yes, I admit to taking the awful, easy route last year and letting him watch WAY too many hours of Thomas the Train so I could help the girls. The fact that I can sing the theme song is pretty pathetic. Can I get a nomination for Mother-of-the-Year please?!

Blogging again

Who knows when I'll get a working camera?! I guess I really would like to start blogging again anyway. I skyped with Kellee last night, and it is so fun to talk to her. I got a virtual tour of her new house, which is really pretty. And she looked so great! She did the 28-day challenge from the E2 diet and loosely follows that now. After all of the reading I did at the beginning of the year I got overwhelmed and decided I was hungry and gave up. I don't think that was the right thing to do. I was reading a lot of extreme ideas, but going back to eating whatever with even less homemade stuff than I was doing before was really just the other side of extreme.

So this morning I made a menu plan for the week, including breakfasts and lunches and snacks, which is the only way I have ever been able to really pay attention to what I'm eating. Then I went grocery shopping and came home and reorganized my pantry and kitchen cabinets. That felt really good. Organizing and buying the food. I guess I should admit that I hate grocery shopping. I hate trying to make choices in the store. So much seems like junk, and I hate buying processed foods when I can make things better myself. But the reality is that I can't remember the last time I made my own graham crackers, and I don't make granola bars very often because I usually eat most of them. Most everything else that I usually make has seemed to quit being made, too. So, most of the time I end up just buying the essentials for suppers and fruits and very few other snacks. It really does feel like we never have food in the house, sometimes even after I get back from shopping. What kind of a mother doesn't know how to go grocery shopping? Well, today was a little bit of redemption. We now have good food in the house, including snacks and breakfast food. My last organization project of the day is going to be cleaning out the fridge. Oh boy! I think there is still a paint brush and roller in there from when I was painting the girls' room a few months ago.

We can't believe this is already July! Where has the summer gone? It is passing right by us as we sit at the pool. We have had a lot of fun swimming so far and plan to keep it up! It's seems like every other load of laundry I wash is full of towels. Speaking of which, I think I should probably go put them in the dryer.